


Salt

by Polomonkey



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Humor, M/M, Prank Wars, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-26
Updated: 2015-11-26
Packaged: 2018-05-03 10:13:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5286815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Polomonkey/pseuds/Polomonkey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Arthur tries to prank Merlin. Tries being the operative word.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Salt

**Author's Note:**

> Pointless floof based on this [tumblr post](http://rpfunstuff.tumblr.com/post/114578134176/imagine-person-a-of-your-otp-switching-the-sugar) :)

Arthur snickers. Some of his pranks took a long time to come to fruition, but the payoff on this one was imminent. Merlin’s alarm would go off in precisely two minutes and he would do his usual zombie stumble to the kitchen for his morning coffee. And, like every morning, he’d ruin Arthur’s carefully selected Guatemalan slow roasted gourmet blend by unrepentantly dumping three spoonfuls of sugar into the cup and rolling his eyes at Arthur’s protestations.

Well not today. Arthur owes Merlin for last week, when he hid under their bed and jumped out at him (which was not at all funny, and sharing pictures of Arthur’s shocked face on Twitter was the act of a cad, plain and simple). And he’s got just the prank to do it. Sure, switching out the sugar for salt wasn’t the most original of capers, but there’s a reason the classics are the classics. And Arthur’s all primed and ready to record the no doubt gloriously splutter-y reaction Merlin will have when he takes a big gulp of salted coffee.

He vaguely remembers Gwen suggesting that the prank wars might subside now that he and Merlin had finally acknowledged their feelings for each other after years of flirting disguised as banter. Ha! What a sweet summer child Gwen was. He’d stop pranking Merlin when he was cold in his grave, or when Merlin conceded that Arthur was the true prank Alpha, whichever came sooner.

He sets his phone on his lap and sits at the table, pretending to read the paper. When Merlin staggers in, bleary eyed and bed-headed, Arthur gives him a casual greeting. He has a familiar strong urge to run his hand through Merlin’s fluffy morning hair but he tamps it down. Affection might distract Merlin. There’ll be time to indulge later (and indulge he will, because Merlin’s hair really is ridiculously fluffy when he’s just woken up, and Arthur can’t help but love to stroke it like he would a cat; pull Merlin into his lap and pet him until Merlin pushes his hand away with a dopey grin and then…)

Crap. He’s getting side-tracked. The power of the Fluff works in mysterious ways. Arthur shakes himself and grabs his phone, ready to record what will hopefully be a freak-out of epic proportions.

“Coffee?” Merlin mumbles, which is about as articulate as he gets at this hour.

“In the pot,” Arthur says, oozing nonchalance.

Merlin grunts and pours himself a cup. Arthur holds his breath as his boyfriend reaches for the sugar tin and takes off the lid.

Merlin stops in mid-motion. There’s an agonising pause in which Arthur’s sure the jig is up, but then Merlin seems to unfreeze himself, grabbing a teaspoon and shovelling out three large heaps.

Perfect. Arthur can hardly contain himself. He tries to school his features into blankness as Merlin sits down opposite him.

Merlin gives him a little smile and raises his cup, as if to say cheers. Arthur presses the camera button on his phone and suppresses a smirk. He is _so_ the prank Alpha.

Merlin lifts the cup to his mouth and takes a huge sip just as Arthur brings his phone up, chortling with glee. And Merlin…

…carries on drinking? For a moment Arthur thinks he must have screwed up, perhaps he left the sugar in the tin after all, and Merlin’s just enjoying his usual horrendously sweet coffee?

Then Merlin meets his eyes and Arthur’s jaw drops.

It is salt. Merlin knows it’s salt. He knew it was salt when he dumped it in.

But goddamned if he isn’t going to drink it all anyway.

In amazed silence, Arthur watches as Merlin downs his entire cup of coffee in the space of about twenty seconds, eyes fixed on Arthur in the most epic death glare of all time.

Then he drains the last drop, bangs the mug back down, and smacks his lips.

“Mmmm,” Merlin says. “Delicious.”

He leans across the table.

“Is there any more?”

Arthur wants to say something biting and witty back, but somehow what comes out is:

“I am so aroused right now.”

Merlin smiles wide.

“Tell me I’m the prank Alpha.”

“You’re the prank Alpha,” Arthur concedes, too impressed to be mad. “For today, anyway.”

Merlin preens.

“Yes I am,” he says smugly. “Now make me pancakes, mere mortal.”

“Kiss me first,” Arthur says and Merlin proves gracious in victory. He also tastes a lot like salt, but Arthur doesn’t mind. Especially when Merlin climbs on his lap while they eat and lets Arthur fluff up his hair to his heart’s content.

That same hair ends up bright green next week when Arthur puts dye in Merlin’s shampoo, but that’s a story for another day…

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [ART: Revenge](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5303726) by [LFB72](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LFB72/pseuds/LFB72)




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